It’s Not About Me…

I have been reflecting on a number of things recently and when I decided to finally write a long overdue blog entry I was immediately struck by the accuracy of my blog name “It’s Not About Me…”   I originally named it because in my world my life is not about me.  I am living for the Lord and it’s all for Him!  What struck me though was how that accurately and a bit painfully describes so many aspects of my life right now.  I suspect many of you reading this will relate!

As a parent, the older my kids get the more I have had to come to the realization that everything I have done for my children is for them, and it’s not about me.  For the most part they do not appreciate it, nor will they anytime soon.  This was, and continues to be a very hard reality for me.  Of course, in my heart I am doing everything for them, but that selfish part of me sure would like some recognition.  Private recognition, public recognition - ANY recognition!  Sad and selfish, but hey - I am just being honest.  Personally, I have given my entire life and career up to be a full time homeschooling mom and I can honestly say that I have never regretted that decision.  At the same time, it’s not so easy to stay motivated and focused knowing that I have at least eleven more years to go, especially when the rewards are so meager.  I hear that they do appreciate all their parents have done for them some day, but it is rumored to generally not take place until after they have kids of their own.  We are raising our kids to be adults which means that the older they get the more they pursue their own aspirations, leaving you in the dust and too often with very little, if any recognition for all your years of devotion, dedication, and sheer hard work!  Can you relate?  If you are a parent of children under 12 or so, you’re not there yet - but be prepared!  On the other hand, if you have offspring between the ages of 12 and 29 - you are most likely nodding knowingly as you read.

In life, it is at this exact spot where the rubber meets the road.  Am I going to give up?  Allow the voice in my head that says, “What is the point?  They won’t remember my hard work and dedication.  They will probably grow up and not even appreciate it at all.  For all I know, they’ll grow up to be embarrassed that they were homeschooled in the first place!  All the years and tears I invested in raising my kids to know and love the Lord, they may choose to turn their back on the Lord totally…  I am just wasting my time…  my life!”  It’s at times like this that I have to quiet that voice and force myself to remember that it’s not about me!  Honestly, it’s not about them either.  I am raising my kids in a loving, solid, Christian, homeschooling environment with everything I have in me and will as long as I have breath in me for one reason and one reason only.  When I get to heaven I want to have them all right there with me as I hear the words I have been living to hear, “Well done my good and faithful servant.  Well done.”

So if the daily drudgery of parenting is getting you down and the thanks and appreciation you get seems nonexistent at best - just remember…  It’s not about you!  Mothering is a thankless job, but a worthy one.  Mothers shape the future, the leaders, and the nation.  They may not recognize it or give us the credit, but that’s not the point anyway.   So to all you mothers out there,  Hang in there!  When the going gets tough…  hang in there!  When nobody is watching…  hang in there!  When no one seems to care…  hang in there!  This Mother’s Day whether you get breakfast in bed - or not, cards, flowers, or nothing for Mother’s Day…  hang in there!  They may not say it, they may not show it but way deep down inside they know that you are the one who gave them their wings and taught them how to fly.  Let them fly and laugh in the wind.  It’s not about you.

To all the mother’s reading this who can relate…  HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!